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Protect Others: Tell Your Story (Please Help Break the Silence-Shame-Intimidation-Exploitation CYCLE ...)

How can telling your story, as one friend told me, protect others?  I suppose that as one progresses, and learns

how to overcome, those lessons learned along the way can help prevent that same harm from befalling other

vulnerable people.  But how?

1. 
Well, if the first childhood memory is one of sad anger, of loss, the green Caddy driving to NYC may impede, for a

lifetime, that love of large cars and of the Big Apple that so many Americans seem to boast.  If that memory is

tied to a borough where the kids rejected you, and your next memory was of being locked in a room, at 4 years of

age, hearing your mothers screams as furniture fell and things broke in the living room, as her boyfriend beat

her, how do you use this to protect others? 

By coming up with a plan for teaching children to protect themselves from silence, from shame, intimidation and

from exploitation, via:

     A New Adult Rite of Passage:  http://meowdate.dreamwidth.org/6177.html


2.
If one was sexually abused at 6, and told not to tell, how do we protect children from parents who can protect

neither their children nor themselves?          -Teach kids that Silence = Death, because silence can lead to

suicide, after a few years. 

3.
If one took refuge from bullies by running and retreating, how to undo that shame?  -Teach kids that we ALL have a

right to our personal boundaries, to equal bodily respect, and to equal human dignity.

4.
If one was refused self-defense because "young ladies don't fight" but they can come home in bruises that will be

ignored, how does one learn to stand up to intimidation?  -Teach kids that if you stand up, you might or might not

be hurt today, but if you cower you WILL agonise for years to come.
 
5.
If one was physically and sexually abused as a teenager, with all the blame heaped on a 15 year old, how to learn

not to exploit nor be exploited?  -Gandhi and Frankl cite adult choice and power: UpHold your Values and Create.  

6.  Only then is one ready to be An Adult: http://adulthoodchallenge.dreamwidth.org/318.html

(This is the real answer to Millie's question:
https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/7591180-answer-to-millie-s-question-on-education)

((and a summary of the Adulthood thread: http://meowdate.dreamwidth.org/tag/adultriteofpassage))

ShiraDest,
April, 12015 HE (Holocene/Human Era)

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( ENGLISH : )


Mes critères pour être adulte sont au nombre de six :
D'abord, chaque enfant doit être capable

1. de nager, autant que faire se peut
2. de se défendre (émotionnellement et physiquement), autant que faire se peut
3. de penser et bâtir des arguments
4. de comprendre des statistiques
5. de conduire les voiture à boîte de vitesses manuelle (ou monter à vélo, à cheval, naviguer...)
6. (Tout ça implique :) la responsabilité de réfléchir et d'accepter des responsabilités pour ses actes.

J'ai passé assez de temps en étudiant toutes ces choses et aussi en pensant sûr mes propres principes.

En terminant, je crois que la dernière preuve pour être reconnu-e comme adulte est le fait d'enseigner à une personne une habilité critique. Par exemple, nager ou écrire. Réfléchir fait aussi partie des points 3 et 6 , comme disait Dr. Viktor Frankl. Cette épreuve ferait partie du Défi pour être Adulte (https://network23.org/communitycoop/2014/04/17/pre-adulthood-adults-and-rites-of-passage/).


À suivre : Est-ce que je suis adulte ? Partie 2 : Moi...

Date « usuelle » : mercredi, 8 octobre 2014 AD
Date Universelle: dimanche, 8 octobre 12014 ÈH (Ère Holocène)
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I will (re?) read this book, as I recall reading at least two books by V. Frankl, but having stumbled across this wonderful blog with quotes, now I must read more.

From

http://stuff.mit.edu/people/gkrasko/Frankl.html

“In my view, that Frankl’s book – at least those one hundred pages of the concentration camp chapter – must be read by everyone who is trying to understand the why of our so comfortable and safe life. In a new school curriculum, I would recommend this book for our teenagers as one of the most important textbooks.

…A long column of inmates, the walking skeletons, suffering from hunger, exhaustion, and, on the top of everything, edema of their legs and feet. Some do not have socks – their frostbitten and chilblain feet are so swollen, that there is no space for socks, even if they had them… Suddenly, the man marching next to Frankl whisper: “If our wives could see us now! I do hope they are better off in their camps and don’t know what is happening to us.” Frankl continues: “And as we stumbled on for miles, slipping on icy spots, supporting each other time and again, dragging one another up and onward, nothing was said, but we both knew: each of us was thinking of his wife” (p. 56).

Thoughts of their loved ones were an important component of that will to meaning that enabled people to survive. .îFor the first time in my life I saw the truth, as it is set into songs by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth is that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of man is through love and in love. I understood how a man who has nothing left in this world still may know bliss, be it only for a brief moment, in the contemplation of his beloved.”(p. 57; italics by Frankl). In that marching column, and on hundreds of other occasions when Frankl and his comrades were uniting in thoughts with those they loved, they did not even know if they were alive. “I knew only one thing – which I have learned well by now: Love goes very far beyond the physical person of the beloved.”(p. 58).”

“to find meaning in life”

Genrich L. Krasko is a retired physicist still affiliated with Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Cambridge, MA. He lives in Peabody, MA with his wife Zeya. ”
Peace, Meaning and Community,
ShiraDestinie
MEOW Date: 8 September 12014 H.E.

https://network23.org/communitycoop/2014/09/08/mans-search-for-meaning-include-community/
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Français
I have six criteria for being an adult. Each prospective adult must be able to:

1. swim, (or inland: find potable water)
2. defend him or herself both emotionally and physically,
3. think critically and build logical arguments,
4. understand statistics,
5. drive and make emergency repairs to manual (stick-shift) cars, or know how to ride and care for bicycles or horses, or otherwise show ability to navigate safely.

These all imply the most important criterion:

6. accepting responsibility to think independently,
taking responsibility for one’s actions and for preventing exploitation.

Personally, I have spent a good deal of time studying each of
the above items, and also reflecting on my own principles. I
believe this reflection to be part of both #3 and #6, as each
adult must know the basis of his or her life principles, if he or
she is to live a fulfilling and stable life. Not only meaning, as
Dr. Viktor Frankl described, but pondered one’s
principles and deciding what gives life meaning, is crucial.

Thus, I believe that the final test for being recognized as an
adult should be to teach someone else a necessary life skill.

For example, swimming, or writing. This Adulthood Challenge is described in an earlier post.

Love, Peace, and … Community Cooperation !!!
Shira Destinie
Gregorian Date: Friday, Jun 27, 2014
Meow Date : Tuesday, June 26, 12014 H.E. (Holocene Era, aka Human Era)

P.S. Many thanks to those whose comments have helped shape changes, particularly to points 1, 2 and 5. -Shira, 10.10.12014 H.E.

Duplicated on: https://network23.org/communitycoop/2014/06/27/am-i-an-adult-part-1-definition/

March 2016

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